Update

I normally game quite a lot, it’s kinda my outlet and I put a lot of time into it. I really enjoy it, I’d love nothing more than to have a job within E-Sports. I write frequent blogs about League of Legends over for Team Dignitas. (My second blog post has been approved and will go live any day now, I’m really excited about it)

The last week I’ve probably not spent over an hour playing games, I’ve watched a few professional games (I do my homework for blog posts and ideas, I like to stay upto date. Yeah I’m nerdy and passionate about it). I’ve been quite focused on finding a job, pretty much any job I suppose. Just my first little stepping stone of my life. I’m really distracted though. Relationship stuff will always take my focus even if there’s just a tiny shine of something in the vast dark night sky of my thoughts.

People that I spent my last three years with are graduating. I’m taking this as my hint to leave social media alone to avoid depression from taking over. I’m more disappointed at myself for how I didn’t graduate. Yet I’m proud of myself for taking things into my own hands and getting out of a miserable, dark place that I had gotten myself into.

The main reason that I’m sad about my position right now is because I’ve left everyone except my family that has been such a huge part of my life over the last three years. I’ll be visiting as much as I physically can, but if I’m working then it’ll only be odd weekends. That’s heartbreaking for me.

When I get to visit my old friends, I’m going to be so torn. There’ll be so much that I miss, so much to catch up on. Not enough time. More importantly, there’s one girl that I want to steal away for myself. It’s actually only her attention that I want. I hate myself for making a huge decision to seek happiness elsewhere. I take it back, I hate the timing of things and what could have been. If things are meant to work, it won’t be easy. I’ve never been in the position of a long distance relationship. Totally scary, but I’ll do anything, ANYTHING for this girl. I’d be blogging about anything else that’s on my mind if there was anything else in my mind to share.

I just can’t wait to see her when I get off of the coach or train and see her beautiful face waiting to see me. I just can’t wait for that moment. From there, lets just see how things go.

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2 thoughts on “Update

  1. Aww I hear you! People graduating is always sad. I miss all of my old friends from college. I rarely see them anymore, but when I do, it’s as if nothing has changed! As we get older, our physical face to face friendships will fade, but the bond will still be strong. It’s natural for us to not see our friends all of the time anymore. You’ll learn how to get by on your own. And you’ll learn that if you really want to see your friends, theres ALWAYS a way. Always!

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