My blog 1 month on

So I genuinely came into making this blog with intentions of it just being my little personal outlet, I didn’t expect a single follower. It’s kinda weird, thinking that anyone is interested in parts of my life fullstop. I mean, I’m not the most interesting person on the internet aha.

I just think it’s really interesting that anyone at all is reading my posts, people that comment in particular and chat are awesome. I love hearing from people from everywhere and anywhere new and working out similarities or differences. Supportive people are the best, I totally appreciate any positives comments.

So yeah, I guess I’m breaking my usual venting of emotions and feelings for a post just to say thanks for giving me a little unexpected positive reinforcement. It’s not the reason I write, but it’s nice to know regardless.

Motivational Wall

This always seems to happen to me. If anything “big” to me is going on in my life I have a habit of really getting down on myself with doubt and worry. It makes me realise I really have a problem with anxiety, I hate it. It’s totally overwhelming.

It gets in the way of everything I do, my blog trial for the gaming company released my first entry and I was so excited for the next two days, I still haven’t gotten much feedback from them. They seem really unorganised, but I guess I’m a trial writer for a big company and I’m only in direct contact with the content manager for the entire site.

Since then I’ve worked on drafts for two different articles in the last week, but I keep wanting it to be perfect. I’ve worked on theories and tried countless different things. I keep doubting myself, even though I know 100% that I’m an expert at League of Legends, so blogging about it is really no problem. I enjoy writing. I love writing actually. I just keep getting hung up on little details rather than a bigger picture.

That applies to a lot of scenarios though.

Today I’m going to be productive. I have no excuse not to complete my next article, and it’ll be great. I think I’ll get really good feedback from it, the article is unique and well thought out. It just scares me that I can lose motivation for things that I’m really passionate about. It scares me a lot.