Pre-Interview Nerves

So I’ve got a big interview tomorrow, i’m really anxious for it. My mum teaches at the school that the job would be at and the entire department knows that, they’re not stupid. They’ve even mentioned it to her. The manager of the ICT department told my mum today that five people are interviewing for two (I think?) jobs. There were three outstanding applications and one of them was mine.

So why am I so nervous? I figure because it’s actually a really good job and a huge opportunity for me to get a steady job and progress too. I’ve laid everything out, picked everything that i’ll wear, set alarms, done everything to be ready for this. I’m just worried that I interview badly for once I guess. Weirdly excitedly anxious.

 

I got a sharp new haircut, kept my facial hair but trimmed neatly (I don’t want to look like a fucking student at a school where I want a job. But I’m 5″5..so that’s a tricky one). I had an absolute fucking nightmare trying to take out my ball-nose ring too. Had to actually go to a piercer (about 10 places enquired to later) to get it taken out with pliars. But all good, I’ve got a tiny little nose stud in now, I feel like I’ve lost that little bit of rebellion that I was holding onto.

As soon as I get some coffee in me and suit up I’ll get into my pre-interview swagger mindset and do great. I’m sure. Kinda. Hopefully. Probably? Maybe. Yeah, no I should do.

To be honest, being around school kids..I can’t help but just feel like this:

I actually got a call back from another job I had applied for weeks back and had a phone interview for. I’ve got another interview for that on Tuesday. But to be blunt, I want the job I’m interviewing for tomorrow. I really do. I’m gonna get it too, I’m confident. Just anxious because I almost feel like it’s mine to lose..That probably sounds dumb, but this is why I tag this sort of post as “rambling” eh?

What’s new? Big steps

Hi little corner of internet, how’s it going? Good weekend?

Mine was hugely uneventful, I have like no social life (not even over-exaggerating here) since moving away from University and back “home” with my family, though it’s like 7 hours away from where I was born and raised.

I realised one thing: I haven’t touched my guitar or been singing for the last couple of months. Really awful. I need to get back doing it because it puts in a miles better place, especially to hear feedback from the odd few here that drop by to listen to my recordings. So over the next few weeks i’m going to work on the first song writing in about 6 months and just get back into my stride.

I’m starting a short (10 week maximum) English class just to pick up basic qualifications that I don’t have because I was ill when I should’ve been picking these up. I’ll be following it up with Maths too and whatever else that comes up. It’s quite..no. It’s demeaning. I’m not gonna lie. When I dropped for the initial testing and introduction class there were 4 people including myself there. Everyone else was at least 10 years older than me: one woman could barely use the pc that the test was on, one guy was Polish and didn’t speak great English.

I might come across as an arse or a hypocrite to comment on them, but I’m aware that as a 22 year old man this isn’t where I seen my path leading. Anyway, it’s a positive just to slap that on my CV and move on. It might only take me a few weeks because of the level I’m at. After say 6 years since I was being taught this stuff at school, there’s a lot of odd things you don’t actually realise that you’ve forgotten. I’ll pick it up in no time. The important thing is that I work individually and the class that I share with others doesn’t limit me in even the slightest of ways.

I mean, the biggest news is something that I’m still trying to be reserved with. But to be completely honest: I’m so fucking excited/apprehensive at the same time.

I got the job interview for ICT support technician at the local school that I was so keen for.

Now, I’ve been given the chance that I’ve been so desperate for. I deserve it, I really do. This job would be a walk in the park to be completely honest. It pays well, I could easily progress by showing the drive that I know I have in me. One thing that has always appeals to me in a job is the chance to dress well daily. I look fucking good in a suit, just saying!

There’s a writing job within the League of Legends E-sports community too that I stumbled across. The deadline is tomorrow and they want a sample piece of writing that I’ve kinda struggled writing. I was going to ask for advice here about whether or not I should go for it or just focus on the other job.

Unlike the other writing work I’ve done within gaming: this actually offers pay. It’d still only be something that I spend..I don’t know. Probably all in all a max of 12 hours a week working on combined with research. What I didn’t mention is that they’re hiring for content writers within either Korean, Chinese or Taiwanese competitive gaming scenes. I actually follow the Korean scene because it’s classed as the best in the world. I just need to do A LOT of work to learn everything I need to.

So I’m gonna spend my afternoon trying to write a respectable sample article and send off an application there too. I’m sure that I could keep up with both. If I don’t get it…well..Nothing ventured, nothing gained right?

This has gotten a little wordy, but i’m bouncing at the minute at the thought of being given a chance by this school. I really need to smash that interview come Friday. I’ll be sure to update before then anyway.

For now, hope you’re all well with whatever part of the path you find yourself on. Keep smiling.

Daily frustrations

I’ve had three hopes and intentions for this week.

The first being to send a letter to Emily, but as much as I’ve thrown away scraps of paper with my scruffy handwriting..I just can’t find the right words to sum up anything that I want to say. I don’t know.

The second was to get a response (hopefully positive) for the job that I applied for previously and really want. Heard nothing, haven’t had a response to my email. When I called them late last week I was told that interviews would be done early this week and that they’d be in touch. Really shitty not to at least tell me I haven’t got the job, huh.

Last of all was the promise I made to record myself playing a song. I’ve recorded sound a little today and just hate how I sound. Completely. I haven’t got a decent microphone and my inbuilt laptop mic doesn’t pick up my voice clearly at certain tones. That and I just hate the sound of my own voice. I couldn’t find any video recording software on my laptop that I thought I would have, I have video with no audio or vice versa. A little annoying and I’m quite tired of making excuses. But yeah.

This week’s going well, I’m just tired of little everyday things chipping away at me and still feel powerless to make a positive impact on my own life right now. Let alone anyone else’s. It’s probably better than I’m single right now and try to pick up my own pieces, if I can manage that.

I get distracted easily.

I really do get distracted easily, I guess I can’t get my head in a good place lately. Everything is a maybe or hopefully, or it feels like it.

I shut myself off when I feel down, or just unwell. I stayed in bed today until 3 just feeling utterly down and depressed. For once I want things to line up and go the way I want. Actually no, the way I deserve. I’ve even shut myself off from venting here, which is just illogical. God, I suck.

I know that this sounds selfish, but I’m serious. I want the girl, I want the job, I want the happiness. I don’t want the money problems. I don’t want the health problems. I want things to start falling into place. I’m tired of the world shitting on me and giving me a challenge daily. Some have it harder, a lot have it easier than me. One thing’s for sure: I’m sick of how 21 years of my life have turned out.

Tomorrow I have a job interview for a job that I want. You know what? I’m going to get it.

Just like a bus..

In timely fashion in my life, after searching for 2 months for a job. Last week I had my first job interview, I get an email today that I have another one for my preferred job. After already being offered and accepting the first job. I’m meant to start Monday for job 1, the interview for job 2 is on Tuesday. Seriously who is writing my script?

My parents are super supporting though thankfully. I spent the whole day stressing about what to do, hence no blogging today until now actually.

So I came to the conclusion of going for Job 2 and giving Job 1 a “Thankyou, but no thankyou” by using simple logic:

(Job 1: Primary School Administration apprenticeship. Job 2: Digital Marketing Co-ordinator apprenticeship)

• Job 2 pays almost double, though still very little (£180ish a week) compared to job 1.
• Job 2 would give me a qualification in creative and digital media, rather than administration that job 1 offers me.
• Job 2 offers the future prospect of taking over from the existing digital marketing co-ordinator.
• Job 1 has a possibility of full time employment, no real progression.

I think I’ve thought it over so much that I’m still trying to justify going for the interview and accepting that the other job isn’t for me, it’s just a job that I wanted out of worry about unemployment. I don’t want to end up unhappy in a job that I don’t want to do.

Most importantly I don’t want to commit another year to looking for a qualification to fit me, or that would be applicable in the future for me. I still feel really weird doing this, I better get over that and do as great in the interview on Tuesday as I did in my last one.

I want that job! I’m looking forward to interviewing for it actually, I need to try to avoid putting pressure on myself over it. If I don’t get it, I don’t get it. The world won’t end, there are tons of other jobs. Even while typing this my head is freaking out and worrying that if I don’t get it I won’t find anything else. God I suck. Wish me luck!

Job interview and self confidence

I got to do one of my favourite things today, I got to suit up.

If I could wear suits every day for the rest of my life, I totally would. I always feel great, some people think I look great too. To a degree, I share that opinion. Though that makes me sound anything but modest. I had a job interview that would normally feel really daunting and scary, but you know what? It wasn’t at all.

I just went into it and decided just to show the employers my personality. I just wanted to make them laugh and show that I’m a great person to be around. It’s far from my ideal job, probably not what I’d want to be doing. I would be settling, but I need something right now. I still feel like I’d be rushing into something that didn’t fit me very well. If they call me in the next few days to offer me the job, I have absolutely no idea how I’ll respond.

It’s an admin job, the same primary school listed an ICT technician job too, which I’d probably prefer. Though neither would be challenging in an academic or mental way. I feel good about how the interview went.

The woman asked me what my i’d say my biggest accomplishment is, it totally stumped me..I answered with this:

Well, I once came second in a Donkey Derby when I was younger.

I totally killed them, and then answered it straight. But I’d already accomplished what I went there for: to get a little of my personality across and have fun with it. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t constantly joke or come across badly. I did myself total justice and the two women interviewing me really liked me.

I asked to be put forward for the ICT technician role too, I think it’ll suit me better. I think they know that too. I have no idea whether or not they’ll hire me, I guess i’ll find out soon enough. Their decision could shape my short term future, that’s really odd to realise. Scary.

I wish I could just move back to Newport with my best friends, so many people I love there. I just can’t do it, my head rules my heart on that one sadly. Short term I’d be the happiest guy around, longer term I’d do myself and anyone around me damage by doing it I think. Which is a shame for more than one reason, but mainly for one reason.

Acceptable haircuts for an interview?

I’ve had a mix of dodgy internet and an awesome day trip to Brighton to deal with lately, I kinda missed posting over that time. Weirdly attached to this already huh.

Where was I? Right, haircut. I have my first interview since beginning job hunting, I’ve kinda set myself on getting this one. It’s only an apprenticeship job, it’s awful pay. But I’d go to college once a week and pick up some useful qualifications. I look awful on paper, that’s another story.

 

So I’ve been trying to decide on a haircut, I get bored. I used to have long hair when I was much much younger, it’s now short. I generally have a swept fringe with quite short back and sides. I’m just bored of it. Lately I’ve actually been getting banter about looking like David Beckham, so I guess my hairstyle is similar to that, so you have an idea.

But I want to change it up, I’m bored. It’s quite a lot of work daily if I want to go to that effort because my hair loves to go curly at a certain length. I was thinking about getting something similar to Rou from Enter Shikari. Like this: ( I couldn’t find many great images)

Anyway, the point is: I know I’m a well presented guy. I come across well in interviews, I’m not big headed about it by the way, just take pride in my appearance. I look fucking awesome in a suit, hell. I’m very employable! Right now my hair is a little longer and messier, I’m getting a haircut anyway. The thing is, I don’t want anything to hurt my chances. I’ll even be taking my nose ring out this week (for the first time, ow.) to swap for a wee nose stud that’s barely noticeable.

I feel like a woman can generally have any hairstyle and still not have it affect her chances of being employed.

Is it the same rule for guys? Would that haircut hurt my chances? Even more so, if I was to get hired and then change to this cut, do you think I’d be well received? I’d love to know some thoughts here. I’m a bit stuck and unsure.

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