Underweight

So I’m a short guy, (5″5) and really slender, last time I visited the doctors and had a basic height and weight check I was basically classed as practically anorexic on the BMI scale. Doubting that has changed. I have really high metabolism so putting weight on is pretty challenging. Since I got ill when I was about 14, I lost about a stone and haven’t really put on any weight since. I haven’t really got any left to lose either.

I realise lately that I have such a problem with eating, I just have so little motivation and find eating a chore even sometimes. I get that sounds a bit weird, it is really isn’t it? I get the feeling unless I change how I think about it I’ll always stay the same weight, it doesn’t hugely bother me but I can have some days where I’ll just feel awful about myself. Just daily eating seems to be a challenge, is it just me that feels like this about food?

It’s not that I have a massive complex about my body image or anything like that, I’m pretty comfortable in my own skin generally. I just struggle to actually eat three meals a day and have a set routine that I don’t get frustrated with.

I guess I should make more of an effort to sort this out before I waste away. As my grandma always says “That boy needs a good tatie pot!”. You can tell she’s Cumbrian haha. I need to find some way to motivate myself with a healthy combination of weight and muscle gain. I fucking hate exercise without some sort of goal though, when I was younger I lived, ate and slept football until I was told I couldn’t anymore after getting ill. I lost pretty much all of my muscle mass that I once had, I’m just scrawny now. I’d actually love to take up boxing or something similar because I could compete, but if I was put into a weight division right now I’d be fighting 14 year old girls.

I guess I still haven’t worked out how do motivate myself to be healthier. I actually get very frustrated with people that complain about being overweight when I struggle so much in my own way. Very few people really understand it and they just think that they’d rather be my weight than theirs. They’re mistaken there.

Advertisements

Relationships, friendships and everything in between

As much as I wish this song fit my thoughts right now, it’s quite the opposite.

I’ve realised that I can actually expand on my last thinking out loud on this topic(I’m awful at being single). Both old relationships and new ones that have dynamics that I don’t want to misread, both mine and their feelings-wise. I love finding people that I have tons in common with. I would find a lot of my friends that are girls physically attractive, but obviously I never really realise or think about it, but I can acknowledge y’know?

I guess I don’t want to misjudge dynamics and ruin things, from both old and new sides. You never truly know if you’re compatible in a relationship, no matter how close you are before that. I don’t want to ruin something that already works so well in its own way. At the same time, I don’t know if I misread something new, I just can’t determine great friend or something “more” with a few people lately. I’m my own worst enemy I swear.

Thinking about this out loud just makes me think that I’m being a moron on every front. Which is totally possible.

Acceptable haircuts for an interview?

I’ve had a mix of dodgy internet and an awesome day trip to Brighton to deal with lately, I kinda missed posting over that time. Weirdly attached to this already huh.

Where was I? Right, haircut. I have my first interview since beginning job hunting, I’ve kinda set myself on getting this one. It’s only an apprenticeship job, it’s awful pay. But I’d go to college once a week and pick up some useful qualifications. I look awful on paper, that’s another story.

david-beckham

 

So I’ve been trying to decide on a haircut, I get bored. I used to have long hair when I was much much younger, it’s now short. I generally have a swept fringe with quite short back and sides. I’m just bored of it. Lately I’ve actually been getting banter about looking like David Beckham, so I guess my hairstyle is similar to that, so you have an idea.

But I want to change it up, I’m bored. It’s quite a lot of work daily if I want to go to that effort because my hair loves to go curly at a certain length. I was thinking about getting something similar to Rou from Enter Shikari. Like this: ( I couldn’t find many great images)

Rou 2 Rou 3

Anyway, the point is: I know I’m a well presented guy. I come across well in interviews, I’m not big headed about it by the way, just take pride in my appearance. I look fucking awesome in a suit, hell. I’m very employable! Right now my hair is a little longer and messier, I’m getting a haircut anyway. The thing is, I don’t want anything to hurt my chances. I’ll even be taking my nose ring out this week (for the first time, ow.) to swap for a wee nose stud that’s barely noticeable.

I feel like a woman can generally have any hairstyle and still not have it affect her chances of being employed.

Is it the same rule for guys? Would that haircut hurt my chances? Even more so, if I was to get hired and then change to this cut, do you think I’d be well received? I’d love to know some thoughts here. I’m a bit stuck and unsure.

.

So I’m thinking of online dating

So i’m thinking of online dating, I’m a 21 year old guy. I’m about 3 months out of my most recent relationship, which ended pretty poorly, but no hard feelings. I want to move forward.

I don’t know anyone where I’m living now, at all. No friend groups, I’m not working yet so no casual interaction with anyone whose eye I might be able to catch, or develop a relationship with. Online dating feels like the logical answer, but the notion terrifies me. Not only that, it makes me feel super lonely.

Is it lame and desperate of me at 21 to want to sign up to dating sites and meet people that way? I just want to find the right girl, you know. I’m also pretty daunted at the options, if i just google online dating I could spend the next fortnight signing upto new websites.

I guess what i’m saying is, please help me out here. Will it be a positive experience? Will it be something I look back on and say: “That’s where I found my wife” 

Where should I start? Or should I even start?

I mean, beside this I have a daydream of visiting a coffee shop in my town and bumping into the most beautiful, perfect, available girl. I’ll much more likely find a group of retired women and a lovely, but very married woman, with children.

Anyway, what do you think I should do? I need your advice, internet.